


THE HEIST - OPERATION ONE RING

by lady_of_parodies (Blistering_Typhoons)



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Crack, Humor, I hope, Multi, The One Ring - Freeform, Thorin is majestic, braaitjie, i wrote this when i was thirteen, might continue, this is stoopid, thranduil is fabulous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-14
Updated: 2018-09-14
Packaged: 2019-07-12 05:16:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15988415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blistering_Typhoons/pseuds/lady_of_parodies
Summary: In which Thranduil The Fabulous hatches a devious plan to steal the One Ring Of Power from Bilbo The Hobbit Burglar™a.k.a.What happens when I don't sleep.





	THE HEIST - OPERATION ONE RING

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo I wrote this when I was 13, keep that in mind (and yes it was intended to be stupid)
> 
> Enjoy!

'Ugh who does that elf think he is?', Thorin Oakenshield, Kinng under the not so Lonely Mountain, cried majestically, sweeping majestically into the dining room.

'I don't know my King, perhaps vain', Balin said wisely.

Thorin sat down at the table, but not before flinging his glorious hair over his shoulder in a majestic manner.

He was rather majestic you see.

'You blind me with your majesty!', Bilbo The Hobbit Burglar™ exclaimed dramatically, fainting right on the spot.

'Oh no! Fili is he going to die?!', Kili cried, even more dramatically than Bilbo The Hobbit Burglar, flinging his head onto the table.

'He'll be fine little bro', Fili, the swagestic heir said, calmly eating his food.

 

Meanwhile far away into the woodland realm, Thranduil danced a fabulous victory dance.

He turned to his fabulous son in training, with a graceful swish of his beautiful hair.

In fact, the sheer beauty of it so fantabulous, every time it's swished a gay angel is born.

'Legolas! Now that Bilbo The Hobbit Burglar™ has fainted, you will Mission Impossible into the Not-So-Lonely-Mountain and retrieve the ring of power!', Thranduil exclaimed fabulously, walking up to his fabulous throne, where his shutter shades lay.

'But father I can't, I promised Gimli we could meet for a braaitjie!', Legolas exclaimed, his elf eyes boring through Thranduil's shades.

'Fine then, I'll use my fabulous powers of charm and drop into Bilbo The Hobbit Burglar's™ room in the dead of the night and get that ring!', Thranduil muttered.

'Alright whatever, I'm going to go now!', Legolas said, taking the potato salad he prepared for the braaitjie.

'Have fun! And remember... be fabulous!', Thranduil exclaimed as Legolas walks away, balancing the salad and the keys of his car.

 

Thranduil sipped his coke deep in thought.

'Ah- ha!', he cried, before the screen fades to black, as Peter Jackson likes cliff-hangers....

The End.... ?


End file.
